Just how much do the airlines bring in with all their fees?

I think by now you all know how I feel about the airlines and their fees! So you won’t be surprised that a recent report once again had me seeing red. According to the report, released by IdeaWorks, a Wisconsin-based market research firm, airline fees have risen by 345% since 2006! And more fees are expected before the end of the year.
In 2008, airline fees brought the airlines $10.25 billion – that’s a lot of changed itineraries and checked bags.

Of course, the airlines want us to know that the industry is expected to lose $9 billion this year due to the recession and fuel costs, but according to the International Air Transport Association (IATA) the US airline industry will actually make a small profit. A result of all the fees, of course.

The US airlines have become so fee crazy, that for the first time a US carrier, Allegiant Air (a Las-Vegas based airline), out-charged Ryanair (the low-cost European airline famous for charging all kinds of crazy fees) bringing in 22.7% of its revenues from extra fees. In just the first half of 2009, Allegiant has brought in $85.9 million in fees, over a total of $56.3 million in all of 2008.

But the report also showed the growing importance of these fees to the larger airlines as well. American Airlines now brings in 9.3% of its revenue from fees; United brings in 7.9% and Delta brings in 6.6% from fees. JetBlue brings in 10% of its total revenue from the extra fees.

So while the airlines make money, flying continues to be a miserable experience for passengers. And passengers never know what the next fee will be and when it will suddenly pop up. It seems that every week an airline is imposing a new fee. The report concluded that eventually all carriers will at the very least charge bag fees for all coach passengers. I’d be willing to go a lot further and say that eventually, coach passengers (both domestic and international) will be charged for everything except the air they breathe and the right to use the bathroom.

Survey finds Americans still traveling despit the recession

I love surveys. I don’t know why, but I just find them fascinating. I love being part of surveys and I love reading the results of surveys. I love the statistics, the bullet points, the conclusions that people draw. I love seeing myself in the surveys and comparing myself to others.

So when a press release for a new travel survey came across my e-mail, I just knew I had to compare myself to the results and share the information. The survey was done by a travel agency franchise organization called Travel Leaders. The company has store-front agencies all around the country bearing the Travel Leaders banner. Their new survey revealed the travel behavior of travelers throughout the United States, including the fact that 84% of those polled have already taken at least one leisure trip in 2009 and more than 88% plan on taking at least one leisure trip between now and the end of the year.

Pretty interesting results, considering the country is in one of its worst recessions in decades. But not surprising really. People are not willing to give up their vacations because they need vacations. Most people need to get away from all the stress the recession is causing. And thankfully, most people still have the means to take a leisure trip, even if it’s just one or two nights away from home.

I can happily say I fit into both of the statistics cited above. I have already taken two leisure trips this year and have another planned for November.

Knowing I have that trip ahead of me to look forward to is sometimes the only thing keeping me going forward on a day-to-day basis. That’s how important vacations are. Do you agree?

The survey also showed that 65% of those polled indicated the trip(s) they’ve either taken or are going to take are within the United States and further than a bordering state. That’s me again! My first and second leisure trips of the year were several states away. Even though one of the trips was just for one night, the fact that I was far from home provided the escape I needed. Not that I think you need to go several states away to escape. I live in New Jersey and I’m sure a few nights at the Jersey shore would offer a very nice escape! Thirty percent of survey respondents agreed, either having taken or planning a trip within their own state this year.

Only my first two trips of the year fit the non-bordering state statistic. My November trip will be out of the country. A little more than 40% of those surveyed by Travel Leaders also said that at least one of their trips was or will be international.

One statistic that my behavior differs from dramatically is what my average spending on leisure trips in 2009 was/will be. Nearly 75% of those surveyed said they would be spending the same or more (the actual number saying they were spending more, and not just the same, was only 27.3%). Instead, I fit in with the 16% who said they would be spending somewhat less this year.

Here's where, unfortunately, the economy and unemployment have had to impact my leisure trip plans. Not only am I spending less on the trips I do take, I am taking less trips. Last year my husband and I took several weekend trips. This year we’ve only taken two and I do not see how we can afford a third one. But like I said, I’ve got one big trip to look forward to and that’s all that really matters!

Finally, I thought the key reasons for taking leisure trips in 2009 were pretty interesting. Just over 70% said they needed rest and relaxation, while 48.9% said they needed to get away. It seems to me the two are almost the same, though I guess I always think “get away” before I think simply “rest and relaxation.” Also related to these two answers, were the 25.9% who said they take a leisure trip for the benefit of their mental/physical health. A little over 50% of respondents said they take a leisure trip every year (also true of my husband and me).

Where do you fit into these survey results? Have you taken at least one trip this year? Are you planning a trip for sometime between now and the end of the year? Are you spending more or less?

I see clues everywhere...

I was reading a book the other day and I read a passage where the protagonist and a friend went to the apartment of a potential suspect to ask some questions. Early in the scene, the author says that the elevator seemed to be stuck on a specific floor, so the two characters had to take the stairs.

Aha! I said to myself. Something is going to happen on the elevator, or maybe the suspect is already dead on the elevator.

As it turned out the elevator had little to do with anything, and was never mentioned again. I realized, that I've started seeing clues everywhere I look when reading a mystery novel. Because, as a writer of mysteries, I'm acutely aware of the fact that most everything I put in a book is there for a reason.

If I mention an object, chances are there's a good reason for mentioning the object. But the reason is not always going to be "clue." I may mention something to describe a situation and create a mood or feeling. I may use an object (like an elevator) to speed up or delay action -- in the case of the scene I read the author needed the characters to take longer to get to the apartment.

And of course, there are the red herrings, when I purposely mention something or someone to make it seem like it's related to the mystery in order to misdirect the reader's attention. I suppose every time I read something and immediately expect it to be a clue, and then it turns out not to be, I can tell myself the author meant it as a red herring. But I'd be lying to myself.

And then sometimes an object mentioned, is just that. An object. Maybe used to describe a room a character is in. Maybe to show what kind of "things" the main character likes, as a way of painting a picture of the character.

But I forget all about those "other" reasons for mentioning objects or people when I'm reading and I automatically assume everything mentioned is important and means something.

And it's frustrating. I can't simply sit back and read a mystery and relax and enjoy the book the way I used to before I started writing. Instead I'm constantly alert, looking for clues that aren't there. Making up scenarios that don't happen.

I'm curious if this happens to other mystery writers when they read? Are they able to turn off the writer part of the brain when reading? Or do they also see ghosts, er clues, everywhere they look?

Hell is writing and sending queries

Queries are the reason I am not a freelance writer. I do not like to write queries. I do not like to send queries. I do not like having to wait to hear back from people I have queried, especially knowing that in this day and age, unless my query has been accepted, chances are I'm not going to get any response.

When I first got laid off I was going through all my contacts at what had been "competitor" publications trying to find freelance work (I knew there were no jobs to be had.). When I e-mailed one particular contact, she told me she was surprised I was putting so much time into finding work with one of the trade publications. She said I'd be better off sending out dozens of query letters a day to the consumer pubs.

Can I say, I didn't even consider it for a moment! Sure I'd love to write for a consumer pub, and maybe if I have a great idea and know the perfect match, I'll send out one query letter. But dozens of queries a day. No way! Call me lazy if you want, but its just not my cup of tea.

As it is, I still have to write query letters to the editor of one of the trade publications that did offer me some freelance work. Thankfully, they're not full-fledged query letters. Instead, they're quick e-mails with a few story ideas that I hope she'll either like, or will trigger another idea that she'll then offer to me.

And like with all query letters, the minute I hit the send button on that query e-mail, I'm on pins and needles waiting for an answer. If I don't get a response right away, I start becoming afraid of new e-mail notices. Is it a response to my query? Did the editor like my idea? Hate it? Did I just blow my chance of ever getting another freelance article again?

Totally irrational, I know. But that's what query letters do. They mess with your brain. So imagine that on a scale ten times larger. I'm sending one or two queries a month, not dozens a day. I think I'd be a trembling, quivering mess if I sent that many queries in a day.

Does that make me less of a writer? I think a lot of writers (i.e. freelancers) would say so. But every writer is different and as much as I love the travel industry and am determined to stay in the industry, my path for doing so will not be through becoming a freelancer. I do write on a freelance basis, but I am not and never will be a freelancer.

The scary thing is, while I've managed to escape (or run away from, if you prefer) the query monster in my professional life, when it comes time to try and get my mystery novel published, I'm not going to have any choice but to face querying head on. That's the ONLY way to get an agent or publisher.

But just thinking about it gives me the creeps! Thankfully, that's at least a year away or more. So for the time being "out of sight, out of mind" is my motto!

Unemployment inertia

It's happening. I can feel it. Every morning when my alarm goes off at 8:30, it strikes. Unemployment inertia.

Why bother? What's the point? Not another day of nothing. I think I'll just go back to sleep.

For the first seven weeks or so of my unemployment I got up religiously at 8:30, or earlier, every morning. I treated each work day as a regular work day. Start work at 9:00 and finish up at 6:00 or 7:00. Around the seventh week, that schedule began to change, and is still changing on a daily basis -- except for early in the week. Mondays, and usually Tuesdays, I can still get up at 8:30 without a problem, it's as the week progresses that the problems begin.

At first it was just the snooze button. The alarm when off at 8:3o and instead of jumping up out of bed, I hit the snooze button. Then I began hitting the snooze button more than once. I've now gotten to the point where my alarm goes off on a Wednesday or later, I hit the snooze button. When the alarm goes off again, I re-set the alarm for anywhere from 15 minutes to a half hour later. At this point, when the alarm goes off for the re-set time I am dragging myself out of bed, though I'm becoming more and more reluctant to do so.

My working days are ending sooner too. By 5:00/5:30 I'm basically done. And even worse, instead of "working" five days a week, I'm down to four -- though I'm usually heading into New York City one day a week to take care of other things, so I guess I can excuse that.

The thing that frightens me is that I'm only just a little over two months unemployed and already inertia has set in. I have to force myself to work on my novel sometimes, force myself to check the job boards, force myself not to just drop onto the couch and give up for the rest of the day. Each day my apartment feels smaller, more like a prison. Each day my computer looks more and more like the enemy. So you want me to work, do you? All right damn computer, show me a job I can apply to for f***'s sake!

And if this has happened after only two months, where am I going to be a month from now?

I want my term of unemployment to represent freedom, a time to do things I have been wanting to do for months or years but have never had the time before. I do not want to let inertia past the front door, but boy is it a sneaky devil. Just when I think I'm feeling motivated, it rears its tired head, begging me to put it all off, despair of a better future and just vegetate.

Maybe I need some sort of charm to ward off inertia. Perhaps there is a spell to banish it from my dwelling? Or maybe I just need to take my own advice to a friend who tends to wake up in the middle of the afternoon -- when the alarm goes off, just get out of bed. Don't think about getting out of bed; like the Nike ads have told us for years, just do it.

Pet peeve

Just a short post today to express my frustration with mystery writers who give away the endings of previous books in their latest series book. It is not always possible to read a series in order. Very often a reader is introduced to a series by picking up a book that either comes someplace in the middle of the series or is the most recently published book in the series. If the reader enjoys the book, the characters and the author's way of writing, most likely she or he will decided to read the earlier books in the series.

BUT! But if the author has already told the reader how the previous book(s) ended, what's the point in picking up the book? The whole point of reading a mystery is to try and figure out whodunit? So if I already know, what's the point in reading the book?

For instance, I'm reading a book called A Charmed Death by Madelyn Alt. It's the fourth book in the Bewitching Mystery series. I didn't realize it was the fourth book when I bought it, only when I picked it up to actually start reading. I figured I'd read it and if I liked it I'd buy or borrow the earlier ones. Then in the middle of the first chapter the author suddenly tells me who died in the last book (the third in the series) and who the killer turned out to be.

I was immediately turned off. There is almost no point in reading the third book now. Maybe, and that's a big MAYBE, I'll go back and read books one and two, but no matter what the author lost me as a reader, and potential buyer, of the third book.

As an aspiring writer, I hope that everything I do as a writer will be to get readers to read each and every one of my books. I don't want to chase anyone away from even a single book. That's seems completely counter-intuitive to the goal of writing books.

Now, I realize there are some things that will be given away in new books. For instance, romances. If in book three the main character gets married, then clearly if I start reading book two and that character is having romance problems, I already know how that's going to end. But that's a subplot and that's ok. I still have the juicy mystery to try to work out.

But don't give the whodunit away, please. Chances are I'll want to read earlier books, but not if I know who the killer is.

First bite!

I came home from a day trip into New York City yesterday to find that I had a message on my voice mail from a potential employer!!

This is the first time since I was laid off a little more than two months ago that I have gotten a call to discuss a job opening. And if that's not thrilling enough, I didn't even apply for the job that's open. The company saw my resume on CareerBuilder.com and thought I looked like a match, so they called me!

I know that getting a call doesn't mean I'm going to get the job. Getting an interview doesn't mean I'm getting the job. But after two months of no one being interested, no one even acknowledging my applications, it's so nice to just hear from someone.

I think that's one of the worst things about applying for jobs in these times. Because so many people are applying for the same job, the chances of getting a call in response are minimal. So you keep putting yourself out there and no one replies. It's like you don't even exist. And that's totally disheartening.

So to have someone call me and tell me they're interested in me, well, that gives me my existence back. And gives me hope that I may actually get a job again someday.

As if fees weren't enough

In his Sept. 7th New York Times column On the Road, Joe Sharkey discusses the airlines' newest method of saying "screw you" to their customers.

Numerous fees for every thing under the sun are no longer enough. Now in an effort to get people off the planes as quickly as possible and then clean the planes even faster, so they can be turned around for another flight, some airlines are prohibiting people from putting anything in the seat pocket in front of them!

In other words, you may not put your paperback book in the seat in front of you. You may not put your pack of tissues, your reading glasses, the magazine you bought at the airport, nothing, nada, zip, zero. Whatever you have with you either goes in your bag under your seat or in the overhead compartment. Screw you if you need them and can't reach them because the seats are too packed together so you can't reach under your seat or there's a bit of turbulence so you may not stand up to get to the overhead bin.

The airline Sharkey experienced this wonderful new rule on was SkyWest, one of the many regional airlines that operates as a subcontractor for some of the large, legacy airlines including United, Delta and Midwest. What's more, the flight attendent who enforced the rule with frigthening efficiency claimed the rule was a safety precaution. Since clearly my pack of tissues and People magazine pose no danger (I can't think of a single circumstance where they might), the "safety" rule is a ruse for some other reason. I can't help but wonder if this flight attendent actually believed she was ensuring the safety of her passengers by enforcing this inane new rule.

Sharkey goes on in his column to say that so far this rule has only been encountered by his readers on regional airlines. He adds that after speaking with the other airlines, they all said that by banning personal belongings in the seat pockets the airline can speed up the cleaning process.

But while this rule so far seems confined to the regional airlines, Sharkey brings up a valid point. Many people who fly regional flights actually booked their tickets with a major carrier, which then subcontracted a route it did not feel warranted one of its own planes to a regional carrier that specializes in the area. These fliers booked a ticket with the major carrier, they paid the major carrier, they expect the rules and regulations that are listed on that major carrier's Web site to prevail. But they don't, nor does the major carrier stick up for its passengers and demand that the regional airlines treat their passengers the way the larger airline would.

I find this hard to believe and once again I'm amazed at how the usual rules don't apply to airlines. If I go to a deli in New York City and order a bagel and that bagel has a piece of glass in it when I bite into it, the deli is responsible for my injury -- even if the deli didn't bake the bagel itself but instead bought the bagel from a bakery. So even though technically they subcontracted the production of their bagels to another company, because I bought the bagel from the deli, they are responsible. How come it's not the same with the airlines?

Is it because airlines offer a service, not a product. Is the company that does the subcontracting not responsible for service provided by the subcontractor it hires?

If I pay Airline A, if they are getting my money, then shouldn't I be subject to their rules? Shouldn't I get all the amenities they offer? Why is it o.k. for them to put a disclaimer in saying, we're not responsible for anything our subcontractors do?

As usual, the airlines leave me with a bitter taste in my mouth, praying for the day when the consumer is finally in a position to say "screw you" back to the airlines.

An interview with the founder of the Love Your Job Search classes

For women, especially young women, looking for a job is a frightening prospect, especially when so many women aren't aware of what their own strengths are or what job would bring them the most fulfilling life. And even for those women who know what they "want to be when they grow up," finding the right job is difficult, especially during these tough times. But help is available. Suzanne Grossman, the founder of Love Your Job (LYJ), a blog and job search class, offers the expertise she has gained from years of working with young women to empower them in our world, as well as the knowledge and know-how her own job and self seeking experiences have taught her.

Gink's Thoughts recently spoke with Suzanne about LYJ and what makes her uniquely qualified to teach women about finding a job they'll love for the rest of their lives.

What is LYJ?

LYJ stands for Love Your Job. LYJ started as a group blog I began with like-minded friends and colleagues. It came about after a group of us were talking, writing and thinking about topics related to career and how having a life that was fulfilling through your work was important and possible. Around the same time, I was putting together career topics for my CUNY students and I realized this information would be equally helpful to women job seekers outside of the university setting. So earlier this year I launched LYJ Search, which is a five week class for women jobseekers in New York City. A version of the class also will be available in Washington, D.C. in October, taught by my colleague Alyssa Best.

What types of skills LYJ Search students learn?

The class incorporates important job seeking skills including resume writing, interviewing, networking and salary negotiation.

Because I don’t believe anyone should be doing a job search without first having a clear idea of what they want to be doing and where, I also take my students through a series of thoughtful exercises through which they envision their ideal work setting and focus on their strengths in order to develop clarity on where they should be directing their job seeking efforts.

I also work very hard to match each woman in the class with professional acquaintances who can be helpful to each woman’s job search.

How did you get involved in the creation of LYJ Search?

I have a significant background in teaching leadership to women, including having worked at the Institute for Women’s Leadership at Rutgers University and the Woodhull Institute for Ethical Leadership. My efforts at both organizations helped me to develop a variety of skills related to job seeking and helping women reach their full potential. Along my journey, I’ve learned the importance of a solid resume and how informational interviews can lead to jobs that I can then pass on to the women in my classes.

I, myself, did many of the same exercises that I use in the class and came to see that one of my strengths is helping others find jobs and encouraging them to aim for work that is truly going to make them happy. I realized I could put this to good use, especially at a time when so many people are struggling with unemployment.

Who can benefit the most from LYJ Search?

The class tends to draw women in their twenties and thirties who are unemployed or ready for a change from their current situation. Having been in the working world for more than twelve years, I can help this demographic the best, partly because I relate to the particular challenges they are facing.

However, I also believe the LYJ Search class can benefit women with more experience in the working world because the skills the class addresses apply universally to any jobseeker. I also am open to working one-to-one with male clients, though for now the classes are for women only.

What do you like best about LYJ, the blog and the Search class?

I enjoy having a space for women to come together and support each other with their job searches. As one participant said before the class, she felt like she was alone against the world with her job search and that can be an overwhelming feeling. With LYJ each of the women in my class receives positive encouragement not only from me but also from each other.

Where can people find out more about LYJ and LYJ Search?

To find out more, visit http://lyjnow.wordpress.com/ or http://lyjnow.wordpress.com/lyj-search/.

Book Review: Sand Sharks by Margaret Maron

Sand Sharks is author Margaret Maron's 15th Deborah Knott Mystery and the first one I've ever read. But after finishing reading it, you can be sure it won't be the last one I'll read. I really liked the character of Deborah Knott and I loved the fact that I had no idea until the last couple of chapters who the killer really was.

In Sand Sharks Judge Deborah Knott attends a summer conference for North Carolina district judges. The conference is at a beach hotel and Deborah is looking forward to seeing old friends and spending all her free time relaxing on the beach. So she's not very happy when she stumbles on the strangled body of another judge. She quickly learns a lot of people disliked the man, whose unethical behavior has hurt a lot people and given the Bench a bad name.

Deborah quickly gets involved in helping to solve the crime when a local police detective asks for her help, since she knows most of the people involved. The investigation gets much more personal when a close friend is run down, and the two crimes seem to be linked.

The best part of Sand Sharks is Deborah herself. She's a very likeable character and realistically written, as are most of the characters in the book. I'd actually go so far as to say characterization is Maron's strongest skill set, at least as far as Sand Sharks goes. I truly enjoyed getting to know each of the characters in the book, and definitely want to go back and read more about them. Although Deborah is happily married in this novel, it is clear she has quite a checkered past where men are concerned, and I'm looking forward to finding out more about all her experiences.

I was a little confused by some of the dialogue in the book. I'm not sure if some of the strange grammar and word structure was supposed to mimic the way people speak in North Carolina, or if it was just bad editing. However, I didn't come across too much of the odd wording, so the few instances of it were easy to ignore.

The plot of Sand Sharks is simple and easy to follow, though I felt Maron was too liberal with red herrings. There were so many red herrings I often felt that some of them must have started out as sub-plots that never got developed. But they were developed enough that at the end of the book there were a couple of story lines I felt were left unresolved and so I was left a bit unsatisfied.

However, perhaps because there were so many red herrings I was never able to figure out who the killer was until very near the end. And that’s always a good thing when reading a mystery!

In the end, it was the character of Deborah who really pulled me in and hooked me enough to want to read more. There’s no higher praise than that, is there?

Getting from A to B is hard, but Aha! moments make it all worthwhile

Writing is hard. Sitting down and staring at the screen and not knowing how to get from point A to B to C is frustrating, and that's when I know what points A,B and C are!

But it's the how-to-get-there that is truly the hardest part of writing. It's the daily grind part, the what else can I find to do so I don't have to write a page of how to get from A to B and then realize its crap and delete it all. It's the staring at the screen for a half hour without typing a single word because I really DO NOT know how to get from one plot point to another.

This past week for instance I have been trying to write a single chapter in which a major plot element happens and really pushes the story forward. But I've been struggling with it because although I know the main gist of it -- my main character talks to someone and learns some very interesting information -- I don't actually know how that plays out. And its very frustrating.

But I keep going back to the computer and if I can get 300 usable words out of an hour's work I'm happy.

Getting from plot point to plot point is the bulk of the work of a writer's job, at least its the bulk of work for this writer. So I suppose in some ways it's also the most fulfilling. When I've finally finished writing a chapter that I'd had no idea how I was going to write (other than the main plot element) I do feel like I've accomplished something major and I always pat myself on the back.

But it's not those moments that make writing fun. What's fun are the Aha! moments. The moments when I'm driving, or washing the dishes or talking to a friend and suddenly it hits me. "This" has to happen in the book. "This" explains perfectly why so-and-so feels a certain why. "This" is the perfect location for the scene where...

It's those moments of revelation that will enrich my story and make it better that make writing so fun. It's when the story takes on a life of its own, and I can't tell it what to do anymore (at least not on the larger scale) and instead the story tells me what will work and what won't.

It's funny because I've read about these Aha! moments before, when I first started seriously contemplating writing a mystery and read some books about writing. Every author talked about how the story unfolded as they wrote and often went in different directions than expected. But somehow I never thought it applied to me. I had already outlined my idea. I thought I had all the main elements figured out. But low and behold after maybe a month or two of writing, ideas began popping up all the time. Each one was a revelation, a mini-epiphany. Each one gave me renewed energy and spurred me on to write more, get through the daily grind.

Now that I'm more than half way through my Aha! moments have slowed. I really do have all the main elements figured out. I mostly get smaller revelations at this point. Little aha! moments that help me with the daily grind, with getting from point to point with the least amount of wrestling with the scene to get it to do What I Want.

But I've still got one big Aha! moment coming. I still don't know quite how the final confrontation between Abi, my main character, and the "bad guy" is going to go. So I'm eagerly waiting for the story to reveal that to me in a blinding moment of Aha!

Until then, I'll keep putting one word after the other, slowly inching forward, moving from Point A to B to C and hoping for lots of little aha! moments and one big Aha!

Need hope?

I was going to try to blog a little today about either my writing process or about the type of murder mystery I'm writing but then I came across an item in one of my Google alert e-mails this morning that really caught my attention. The keyword on the alert is "cruise" and so there was a link to an entry on a Web site about a couple whose boss paid for a cruise for them.

How nice, I thought, I'd like to read that. It's always nice to read about when nice things happen to people. Especially, as we mostly hear about all the bad stuff that happens to people. I followed the link and landed on GivesMeHope.com. At first I was thinking, oh god, another religious Web site with people finding hope in god, but it wasn't. Instead it was a site for people who found hope in other people.

I quickly went from just reading the one entry that had gotten me there to scrolling through all the entries, and getting a little teary-eyed at some of them.

GivesMeHope.com is a site that allows people to post their own personal stories about experiences they've had that have given them back hope. Some are a bit far out and have to do with "miracles," and some seem more based on hearsay and urban myth. But most are about people being good and kind and wonderful to other people. The kind of stories we need more of. The kind of stories that inspire us to be better people.

Here's one such story that I read on the site:

My youngest brother died unexpectedly while I was studying abroad. A cab driver found me crying alone in a phone booth after midnight. He offered me help and a cup of tea, arranged a 73+ kilometer cab ride for me so I could make my morning flight home. I never even learned his name.

But before you think this stuff only happens to other people, or hardly ever, or maybe the stories aren't even true. Let me tell you about my own experience with someone who gave me hope.

On the way back from a work trip, I had to fly through Miami airport. When I got there in early evening I found out my flight to Newark had been canceled and I was being rerouted to JFK airport. I had several hours to wait and had not eaten since early afternoon. I was tired and annoyed at American Airlines; I had not had a good business trip and had gotten some news that morning that had upset me.

I went to the terminal where my flight was departing from and went to get some food at one of the food stands. I had no cash because ATMs in the place I'd been for the business trip had been few and far between and I had never found one. Nor did there seem to be one inside the terminal. When I tried to use my credit card I was told the stand only took cash. So I tried another place, only cash. At this point I was practically shaking from hunger and emotional exhaustion.

I finally figured I'd go into the restaurant/bar even though I knew that would be more expensive. As I was ordering the waiter told me all the credit card processing abilities in the entire terminal were down and they could only take cash. I burst into tears. A man at the table next to mine gave me some napkins and told me he'd pay for my food if I needed it. At the same time the waiter brought me some water and told me that he could take an imprint of my credit card and then charge me later. He said a lot of people don't like to do that though because it's easier for the number to be stolen that way. I told the man at the table next to mine thank you for the offer but I would do the credit card imprint.

I called a friend, told her what was happening and began crying hysterically again. As I was talking the waiter came over with my food. He came back a few minutes later and said the man who had been sitting next to me had already paid for my meal, and then the waiter handed me a $20 bill. The man had asked the waiter to give it to me because he could see I was having some kind of trouble and he felt I needed it. The man had already left the restaurant. When I turned to look for him he was standing outside making sure the waiter had given me the money. He smiled and nodded at me when I signalled my ecstatic thanks and then he walked away.

I will never know that man's name. I will never be able to truly thank him. But he gave me hope that there are still good people in the world. When I got back home and back to easy access to an ATM, I donated $20 to charity. Since that day I've tried to remember him whenever I'm in a situation where I can help others.

Have you ever had a similar experience? Has somebody given you hope? Have you given somebody else hope?

The coolest calendar

In struggling to find something to write about today, I found my eyes roving around my desk looking for inspiration. Catching sight of my calendar I smiled, amazed that after so many years I still use the same calendar every year and have been doing so since I was a teenager. They are always Hanukkah gifts from my mother, and I always know I'm going to get one.

The calendar is called "Cat Lovers Against the Bomb" and is published by Nebraskans for Peace, a peace activist group in Nebraska. The group has been producing the calendar since 1984.
I love the calendar because it combines two things important to me -- peace and cats. And I believe, as do the people who created the calendar, that the two go perfectly together. The calendar is full of fun, adorable black and white photos of cats paired with thought-provoking quotes by famous people.

For instance for this month's page, the photo is of two cats, one laying atop the other with its head on the other's head. The accompanying quote is "My humanity is bound up in yours, for we can only be human together," by Archbishop Desmond Tutu. February's page featured two cats in silhouette seemingly kissing with this quote: "An act of love, a voluntary taking on oneself of some of the pain of the world, increases the courage and love and hope of all." -- Dorothy Day.

Of course, the calendar does not take itself too seriously, but maintains a sense of humor (just like cats do!) and the March quote comes from Dennis the Menace and says "Meow is like Aloha... it can mean anything."

In addition to the photos and quotes, the calendar is full of facts about virtually every day of the year. Most of the facts are political or peace related, but several are about amazing cats.

Here's a smattering of September facts:
September 1: On this date in 1939, World War II began when Germany invaded Poland.
September 9: On this date in 1828, Leo Tolstoy was born and in 1993 the PLO and Israel agreed to recognize each other.
September 15: On this date in 1963 the 16th St. Baptist Church in Birmingham, AL, was bombed.
September 18: On this date in 1838 the New England Nonviolent Resistance Society was founded and in 1998 the Basque separatist group, ETA, began an open-ended truce.
September 20: On this day in 1987, Bities, a 16-year old cat with cataracts, arrived back in Oregon after being lost and located 3 months later in Lincoln, NE.
Septebmer 25: On this date in 1992, California became the 7th state to bar job discrimination against homosexuals.

Do you want to know what significant event happened on your birthday? Leave me a comment with your birth month and date and I'll let you know.

Acupuncture for only $20!

I recently discovered an acupuncture place in New York City called "City Acupuncture of New York." Doesn't sound all that exciting right? There are probably a hundred places or more to go to get acupuncture in New York City? But how many of them cost between $20 and $40?

The philosophy behind City Acupuncture of New York is that acupuncture should not only be for the rich. It should be for everyone, and not only for just a few appointments but for as long, and as often, as people like. So, because they don't want money to keep people from reaping the benefits of acupuncture, they offer a sliding scale of $20 to $40. You chose what you can pay; they won't ask you to justify your choice.

To do this, City Acupuncture of New York provides acupuncture in a communal setting rather than a private one. Five to six people are usually being treated at the same time in an open space. There is no privacy beyond the fact that everyone there is in their own inner world, relaxing and concentrating on their own treatment and not interested in yours. Soft new age music does mask most of the conversation between the acupuncturist and the patient, so you really can't hear what someone else is being treated for and they can't hear what you're being treated for.

The acupuncturist on duty does not go into long medical questioning but instead asks a few questions about your main complaint, checks your tongue and pulse and decides on a course of action. This allows more people to be treated in a set amount of time. Rather than being at an acupuncturist for an hour to an hour and a half of which 20 to 30 minutes is spent talking about all your symptoms, you're there for an hour of which maybe 5 minutes is spent talking.

It's been more than five years since I was last at an acupuncturist and I've been wanting to go back to it for some time, but the price (and the fact that insurance doesn't cover it) have kept me away. But I have always found acupuncture to help me in the past and I always knew I'd go back to it as soon as I could. So finding a place that only costs $20 to $40 was all the excuse I needed.

I went for my first visit to City Acupuncture of New York two days ago and found it to be very relaxing. The atmosphere is very low-key, everyone speaks softly and the new age music and tinkling water fountain are soothing. My acupuncturist seemed capable and was quick and deft with the needle insertions. All the acupuncturists at the place are Licensed (L.Ac) and hold Masters' Degrees in Traditional Oriental Medicine.

It was strange seeing others getting their treatment, some reclining in suspended lounge chairs, others lying on tables. But I barely had time to register their presence before I was lying on the table with needles inserted and drifting off into my own space.

My biggest issue (and it may very well be just my "issue") with the place was its cleanliness. While the acupuncture needles were definitely sterile (one-use only) the coverings on the tables and chairs were not quite as clean as I would like. The pillow beneath my head was covered by only a new paper towel and I don't think the sheet I was lying on was being used by one person at a time. Of course I could be wrong about that; I didn't actually ask. And it wasn't that it looked dirty, it just looked worn, which of course could come from multiple washings I suppose. It just doesn't have the white, sterile feeling of a regular doctor's office that I usually find comforting.

However, two days later I'm feeling pretty good. I've had the most fantastic nights' sleep and am hoping the effects will stick with me. I've made another appointment for next week, though I had to switch to a different day and acupuncturist because availability fills up very fast.

If you've done acupuncture before but haven't been able to continue with it because of the $100-plus fees, I do recommend City Acupuncture of New York. However, if you've never tried it before and you're even just the least bit nervous about it, I'm not sure the place is for you. I'd probably suggest one or two visits to a private acupuncturist first to get used to the process before switching to City Acupuncture.

Book Review: The Magicians by Lev Grossman

I think it would be too simplistic to say that if you liked the Harry Potter books and/or grew up on C.S. Lewis’ Narnia series, then you’ll like Lev Grossman’s The Magicians, even if that happens to be true.

Instead, I would go one step further and say if you ever hoped, prayed, needed the worlds in those books to be true… If you ever sat on the staircase in your house as a little kid staring intently at a photograph waiting for magic to pull you into the picture and an amazing adventure (like I did when I was a kid)… If even as you’re entering middle-age, or leaving it behind, you still think a magical adventure is somehow waiting around the corner for you, then The Magicians truly is the book for you.

The Magicians is the story of Quentin Coldwater, a quiet, nerdy kid, who at age 17 has not yet found his place in the world. Instead, he lives inside his imagination, in Fillory, that idyllic, cozy make-believe land, where animals talk and orphaned children go on merry adventures. For Quentin, a magical life in Fillory is the life he was meant to live. So he thinks he’s finally on the right track when, on his way to a college admissions interview, he receives an invitation to test for and attend a magical college in upstate New York.

During his five years at Brakebills College for Magical Pedagogy, Quentin learns all about magic, including how to cast spells and shapeshift, while at the same time experiencing college just like every teenager does, making friends, discovering sex, and imbibing too much alcohol. But at the end of five years, he’s still unfulfilled, still searching for his place in the world.

Upon graduating, Quentin loses himself completely. He’s rich, powerful, living in Manhattan, what could be better? But under the almost frantic urge to satisfy every craving, Quentin still yearns for meaning. So when a fellow Brakebills graduate stumbles across the entryway to Fillory, Quentin is sure he’s finally found “it,” what he’s been waiting for his whole life.

But childhood dreams are often built on dark truths and Quentin is not prepared for what awaits.

I knew I was going to like, I mean really like, The Magicians when on page five (of the whopping 402-page book) I read the following:

He followed James and Julia past bodegas, Laundromats, hipster boutiques, cell-phone stores limned with neon piping, past a bar where old people were already drinking at three forty-five in the afternoon, past a brown-brick Veterans of Foreign Walls hall with plastic patio furniture on the sidewalk in front of it. All of it just confirmed his belief that his real life, the life he should be living, had been mislaid through some clerical error by the cosmic bureaucracy. This couldn’t be it. It had been diverted somewhere else, to somebody else, and he’d been issued this shitty substitute faux life instead.

Grossman hit the nail on the head. That is exactly how I feel most of the time, but I’d never seen it said so eloquently before. Of course, Grossman wasn’t talking about me. He’s describing Quentin’s feelings, who at the time of this paragraph is 17 years old.

But it didn’t matter that I’m a 37-year old woman and not a 17-year old boy. I related to Quentin almost from the get-go and even as Quentin gets older, more annoying, shallower, more hedonistic, shadows of “me” followed his story and kept me hooked. Even when I hated Quentin, I still saw myself in him because Quentin lives his life under the same “if only” philosophy I do.

If only magic were real, life would be perfect, Quentin believes, until magic is real and life still isn’t perfect. If only he could go to Fillory, life would be o.k. again. But of course, after tragedy life is never really o.k. again.

I live the same life. If only I could win the big Mega Millions jackpot. If only I could become a published author. If only I had two dogs and three cats. If only, if only, if only.

I suppose it’s fair to say that sometimes I accept that there is no “if only,” that this is the only life I get and I’d better start living it before it’s too late. Logically, I know that no matter where you go, there you are; there is no escape.

But deep inside I’m still waiting for “the life I was meant to lead” to be dropped in my lap, and that is why The Magicians was more than just a good story, one that pays homage to some of my favorite authors and fantasy stories.

Quentin is not a particularly likeable character, even if he is a compelling one. Nor is the end of the novel a very satisfying one. At the end Quentin has experienced some of life’s harshest lessons, and yet he doesn’t seemed to have actually learned anything.

On turning the last page, I found myself completely disappointed in Quentin, but perhaps in the same way I’m often disappointed in myself when I realize I haven’t grown up yet either, and that I’m still waiting for life to deliver happiness and fulfillment in a prettily-wrapped package to my door.

Writers have to know everything

I'm ashamed to say I'm having trouble figuring out how I'm supposed to obtain information I need to write my book. I'm ashamed because I'm a librarian (well I have an MLS even if I don't work as a librarian) and should therefore know how to obtain any information I need. But I've found when writing that sometimes it feels like I need to know everything, because I never know what the newest type of information I'm going to want or need to throw into my book.

But here's the thing. I do know how to obtain lots of information. For instance, I had to pick out which branch of the military a character of mine was in and determine which base he had been assigned to. I was able to do that without a problem; just took a little bit of research. When I needed to figure out who would investigate a death on a cruise ship, and what the basic protocol would be, a little research again dug up the answer.

But some of the information I need is so specific, and at such a small level of detail, that so far no amount of research is helping. Like right now I'm working on a scene where Abi, my main character, has to get lost on the streets of Dover, Delaware while looking for a restaurant. She gets lost because her GPS doesn't recognize that the street it wants to send her on is a one-way street, but as I was writing I realized I don't know if there are any one-way streets in Dover. I also need to pick a restaurant in a somewhat low-income part of Dover, but when I tried to find out which "neighborhoods" in Dover are low-income I couldn't find anything. I couldn't even find any references to neighborhoods in Dover at all.

So do I go on a roadtrip to Dover? For what amounts to four pages of my book? That seems a bit extreme to me. Sure, if I were setting the entire novel in Dover, then a roadtrip would be in order. But for a single scene? I don't think its worth it. But how am I supposed to find the information I need? Are there Dover, Delaware experts out there? Anyone reading this know anything about Dover?

This is what I mean when I say writers seem to have to know everything, because the type of information we need is so specific, so detail driven that it's hard to find through research.

And don't get me started on the crimes. I lucked out in finding a resource who could help me figure out how to poison someone, but now I need info on a few other crimes. I've even considered walking into my local police station to ask for help. But 1.) I'm afraid to sound like a nut job and 2.) the crimes I need to committ in my books are not the kind that suburbian police officers deal with on even a rare occassion.

But even if I'm often frustrated. Even if I sometimes spend hours searching the Internet for a tiny piece of minutiae that I can't find... I am not quitting. I'll keep searching, keep asking others for help, and, goddamnit, if I have to I'll roadtrip it to Dover.